A piece of his mind

Cross the border they said,you'll love it they sang. School will be easy I thought, it'll be doable they responded. Hold on to your dreams,don't give up. Incur knowledge and you'll have the ability to change the world. Use your time wisely,study with all your heart,pay attention, ask questions... distinction is your middle name. But in plain sight, I believe they lied.

Hours spent trying to comprehend... to comprehend not to actually work. Hours planned,set apart for work but my body simply refuses. Not to be funny but to inform me of the over usage that I put it through on a daily basis only to result in less than average marks. Where do I find distinction again?

I mean yes it exists. I can point out how I feel at 7:30 when I wake up and compare it to 17:30 when I knock off. That's distinction. Head full of E=MC2,chemical calculations and reactions wondering when their relations with me will be a tad bit friendly because right now I'm mixed with fear or failing,incapability of understanding, lack of motivation to learn coupled with  burdens of the people I left at home and the man I want to be.

I'm only 19 by the way. I came here to be somebody. I was told I could do it ... I just wasn't aware at what cost. They say triumph has a bitter sweet taste... success has an even better one,I mean I am acquiring immunity from perishing every time I swipe my card in and out of campus for lack of knowledge doesn't exist in my world. I have textbooks,bags under my eyes and empty wallets to show that...

But nobody warned me about the hiccups that come with understanding... there's just no water available to stop them.

Ayoola Mé

And then I looked

Or rather opened my eyes.
 I was willingly blinded by hopes and dreams,
 My cliché ideas of what reality should be.

 But now,


 Oh now I am wise.
 Yes wisdom reigns, truth as well.
See,
 I am not afraid of the outside world and I am so open to discuss them.
 I mean ignorance can only take me so far but acknowledgement, yes that will take me to the moon and back all buckled up and happy.

And then I looked...
At my soul, my spirit-my mind
And I was pleased.

I had(HAVE) taken up ownership of the God in me.
I knew(KNOW) that I am made to be like Him
But at the same time I am one with my people...

And so with my eyes open,
And with God in me...

Change is inevitable. I am a prophet among the nations.
Speaking forth both spiritual truths and bringing awareness to the people.

I am Ayoola,
Ambassador

Conversations with the Messiah

John 14; 8 Philip said, “Lord, show us the Father and that will be enough for us.”It should actually be rewritten you know, state "Yola said". I was one who always had questions. I didn't doubt God's existence, no;I just never knew Him.I was like Philip,he had lived,walked with Jesus but he needed more proof, more tangible proof.I had lived with my parents who are pastors all my life,I had gone to church,prayed,read my Bible but not once did it feel like He was present or He was mine.
John 14:10 "Believe you not that I am in the Father, and the Father in me? the words that I speak unto you I speak not of myself: but the Father that dwells in me, he does the works"
Until He challenged me that is... When He gave me His fullness,His whole being,until he made me a believer.
See God doesn't work in mysterious ways, He works with a willing heart. He is more than able to meet our needs,satisfy our desires,to be a father. We just need to remove the walls we build and get rid of unbelief and doubt.
We can play the blame game for all eternity. You know the one where "it's God's fault" but just as one studies in psychology,methods of displacement don't heal a soul,they just bandage them for a while. It got to a point where I let my guard down, where I was hungry for Him, where I wanted to feel Him,touch Him. You know it says in 1Corinthians 6:19 "Don't you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself," Succumbing to the call of the Master is so easy and once that's done He knows you're ready for the REAL Him. He welcomes you with gifts John 14:26 "But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said" The supernatural helper makes His home in us. We are given an unfair advantage to you, out of this world abilities, I am still in awe. See when God spoke to me, I was ready. He opened up His flood gates and poured out everything from on high. He made me cry,laugh,sing,dance. I held His face and burst into tears because His glory was too real. 
I serve a living God who has taught me that above all else love is amazing. Love pushes you closer to the good things in life. Love makes it easy for you to give like He did in John 3:16. Love makes it easy for you to pray for other people even if you're experiencing hard times, an above self mentality.One who gives me the ability to prophesy, to speak in tongues, to stand before Him boldly. I can;t even begin to express just how AUTHENTIC my relationship is with Him.
I asked and I received. Like He did with Philip,He gave me answers. 
Dare to Believe.

Ayoola Mè 

x

Because you can...

For the unwillingness of our flesh shall be the end of us.
Not ruled by thoughts but by what or body says,
I mean who are we?
Slaves to the overall that clothes our souls?
What manner of man is this that subjects itself to the law of flesh

weaklings.

Why do we care.
Push on soldier, being tired isn't going to dodge that bullet for you.
Feeling worthless and unwanted won't pay the bills.

Upright.

Stand tall and bold lad.
You are meant to be at the top now act like it.
You're amazing,
You own that body now show it!

For the willingness to overcome laziness will get us far in life.
Carpe Diem like an eager young one
Dream big because you're big enough to do it.

Stay beautiful,

Ayoola Me

As it continues...

I'm a sucker for attention,
Emotions... feelings.
I'm an idiot.
I crave the fundamental bases of what makes souls tickle,
The cores of LOVE.

Acceptance... it's stupid right?
The need to BE-long,
To BE wanted...
To BE loved.

I'm a sucker for attention.
Snapchat my whole life just so you can recognize
Refreshing feeds checking if I matter to you
LOVE.

There's something wrong with me..
I'm outchea trying to force my square shaped self into the circles of life.
I'm learning to double tap on the door of my mind,
Letting go of motivations and drive
But allowing myself to BE the Cause and Reason I burn the mid-night oil.

Evolving from a sucker for attention...
To BEing a lover of expression, growth and self validation.

I am smart...emotionally free.
Emancipated from society,
Well I am learning.

I am Ayoola and the journey continues.

                 xx

Hello Again

Transformation is real,the past couple of weeks have been a helluva ride and I didn't have my belt on for protection. What am I saying?

I fell,
Bruised myself a lot,
I bled.

 I got hurt but I healed.
All I have left are the scars, scabs and a few open wounds.

Evolution is the way of life.
Natural selection occurs and it's basically the survival of the fittest.

Well in my case it was "Survival of the Meant-To-Be's"
I can count the [characters] that lasted...

I can name the many that were birthed.

I am grateful.

So yes Ayoola is back in the building.
Am I different?

     Most certainly.
But I hope you like the content I'll be putting up.


HELLO AGAIN.

Ayoola Mè

Conversations With You: Lwazi Mahlangu

Caterpillars & Snakes

Who said we can't be great?

Who said we can't make love to our notebooks with our pens.

Who said we can't paint the town red,blue whatever colour ink that the pen we use that day blurts out that day?

I'm grateful for our late night chats,

From the days we did 1000 words for a special friend,

To the days we used up night shift then airtime,

To the morning check ups in the school corridors

Uncle Dandelion...

Bunny 

I'll keep it short.

You know it's real.

Ayoola Mè